Changes

On Thursday, I broke a tooth during a Google Meet on what seemed like an otherwise harmless yellow jellybean. I rushed in to an empty dentist's office, where a hygienist had to unlock the door for me, then patched the open gap with temporary cement herself to last until my dentist could take me for an emergency appointment on Monday. When I woke up this morning, the temporary fix was gone. I probably swallowed it while grinding my teeth during the night. So today, I'm stuck with an uncomfortable broken tooth that my tongue hits anytime I attempt to speak or eat. I keep thinking about a writing prompt that my students responded to a week before our last day of school before self-quarantine for National Dentist's Day, and the horrors that so many of us associate with dental work. 

The dentists's office is just another area of life that has been impacted by COVID-19. I'm also four days away from having a new daughter, which will look very different now than it did when I had my son four years ago. I'm anxious and scared, but still excited to meet this tiny new person and enter another stage of my life.

It's hard to say goodbye to my students without really having the chance to say goodbye. The last time I met with my classes on March 13th, I had a good awareness of what was coming based on what I'd been reading and following in the news for the past two months, but that whole day still felt so surreal as it was actually happening. I remember walking back from the lunchroom with my tray and passing a student who said, "See you in May!" and laughing a little, because I still thought we'd probably be back after spring break if everything went as we hoped. I don't remember if I erased the whiteboard before I left the building that evening, but I do remember thinking this could be the last time I see them for a long time and then immediately quelling the thought. I miss my students. I miss my classroom. I miss our community. I miss watching those stupid cat videos with captions with my Warhawk Time. No matter what happens, I will still miss the next month and a half of school where so much fun happens. But I'm so grateful for the six and a half months that we got to spend together this year.